Table Hockey Blog

Carlo Bossio was asked to provide some stories here and not just direct people to websites. Well, I’ll help Carlo. I know taking time to do write-ups takes time and effort. So, Carlo, let me help you buddy. Here’s two contrasting stories. One as seen by me from afar and the other up close and first hand experience.

Background
Dr. Lou Marinoff is a member of the NYCTHA. He’s not a youngster. Recently at our NY league date at Coney Is., NY, he recounted life in the 1950s travelling from Montreal (his childhood home) to Coney Is., NY to visit relatives. So, you get the idea on age.

For those of you who already know the information in this paragraph has been repeated before. He was a three-time Canadian Open Coleco Champion in the early 1980s. Out of the game since the 1980s, he returned to the sport in 2006. His short term goal was to crack the Top 10 in Canada.

He, told us at our league date he was going to “try” to make it to Sherbrooke, but he would be coming back from Germany with little room for flight delays and whatnot. I told him when I’ve gone to tournaments or our playoffs on little sleep, I just get my butt whooped. Read the rest of this entry »

Media Black Out Lifted!

Dear friends of Snake River. You may be pleased to find out that the media black out has been lifted. During the LAHTO playoffs the community thought it might be better if I kept my mouth shut. Lot of good that did us didn’t it!

Well now that it is over here is a rant I had leading up to the playoffs.

Rosaries and Long-john’s

I believe we all have something. Ma Kettle prefers the rosary and Pa has his favourite Care Bear long johns. Milton has a medicine bag and Boo Riddley, our “fixer’, makes his own luck with a pair of brass knuckles.

So a couple of questions for you dear reader. Does hockey attract or originate superstition? Here in the River that debate was over a long time ago. Hockey is a religion and with it comes all the trappings of rites and rituals, barbecues and bingo. These acts must be respected lest we anger the gods more than they already are.

But now that we have opened the door to our community and had a look at the outside, we have invited in a new angle to the debate. Practicality.

You see some time last year, the Skirrs’ CEO. Kent Jack Cooke Kent Jack purchased one of those fancy pants Euro soccer shirts. We think it makes him feel like he is more involved in the game. Anywho, at one point Mrs. Jack asked if he was ever going to wash said jersey?

Well she may as well just thrown a rock at the biggest bee’s nest in town. Opinions have been flying around the village leaving a trail of stinging remarks, and causing near death like reactions.

“Even Jesus needed a bath” is the main argument out of the YES camp. The NO side counters with, “That didn’t go so well for him did it now. And consider further, the fact that John his Bather had all his hats made null and void.”

Looking at our winning percentage, I don’t know how much luck is really contained in that polyester blend anyway, so I will ask you brothers and sisters.

To wash or not to wash, that is the question. Whether ‘tis nobler in the noggin to suffer the stinks and sorrows of olfactory sensation, or by a launder, to end them?

Do you guys and gals have any of the same rituals we perform here? Tapping the goalie’s pads? Cookies for Santa Clause? Sacrificing a chicken?

You see our farm team The Wild is due for a playoff round with “The Machine” and we need all the luck we can gather.

Merry Christmas

Bill Mackenzie

Ps. Now that I am free to express, watch out. It’s like I’ve been constipated for a month. So if bilious outputs tend to turn your stomach, I would then advise you to stay clear of the outhouse.

Attendu que le Canada est fonde sur des principes qui reconnaissent la suprimatie de Dieu et la primaute du droit.

Libertes fondamentales; Liberte de conscience er de relifion. Libere de pensee de croyance d opinion et d’espression.

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You see, for about three years now the SRS Ukrainian Ladies Booster Club has been putting on a dance every second week. Oh sure we head off to Pixely, Hooterville, and Soho for their major social gatherings, but in essence this is the only dance in town.

At first old Bill thoroughly enjoyed being spun around the dance floor by some lady that has wrists the size of my thighs. But now the sheen has worn off. If you threw The Beer Barrel Polka into the mix from time to time I wouldn’t throw up, but wall to wall accordion and tuba is another story.

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TH History - It was: Country vs. Country, City vs. City, and Player vs. Player. It was Round 3 of the “2nd Annual Burlington International”, Canada, 1978.

Twenty-nine players began this tournament: Six from the States, twenty-three from Canada. By Round Three, sixteen players remained in the hunt for the Championship. The Americans made up only 20% of the total number of players in the tournament. However, of the original American contingent they lost only one player, 83% made it to Round Three. Of the original Canadian contingent, only 47% had advanced. The Canadians lost their four-to-one advantage in players. Attrition. Nonetheless, the Canadians still had double the Americans in quantity of players.

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So old Bill is a blogger. My mother would be so proud. I can hear her now. “What the hell is that?” she would say. Well mother, at first I really didn’t know. Accordingly, I went to Snake River’s most famous scientist, Willy Bates Macron. At first he was speechifying regarding the how of the thing. More three-letter acronyms than potatoes at Pervis Spikes still. Eventually he realized who he was talking to, and went on to say, “Just act as if you were submitting an article for the world’s largest newspaper. A rag so colossal in its magnitude, that if each page were ever stacked end to end, the damn thing would go to the moon and beyond. Your discourse, although just one in ten billion, could be read by practically anyone and everyone.”

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I want to thank Warren for the opportunity to contribute on the Table Hockey Heaven blog. We all owe Warren a huge debt of gratitude for his efforts to make this awesome website available to everyone.

Table hockey is the greatest game!

Since discovering organized table hockey while online about a year ago, it has been quite a ride!

My earliest memories of table hockey go back to Christmas morning when I was six years old. Santa brought my three brothers and I a beautiful, brand new 1963 Eagle Stanley Cup table hockey game (table top model). How I wish I could get my hands on another one! Jeff Mancini or anyone have one?

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Hello All!  Thanks for taking the time to check out my table hockey weblog here on table hockey heaven.  Thanks also to Warren for inviting me and encouraging me to participate.  You are doing great work and all of us table hockey players really appreciate it.

For my first weblog I am going to explain why I believe that table hockey is a sport that empowers the players and why it is worth investing your time, energy and hard earned dollars into.  This is just the first of four “Riffs” that I hope you take the time to read and comment upon–I have thick skin so don’t be gentle if you don’t agree.

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Sometimes I wish I lived in Sweden. Over there you will never hear an argument over which table hockey board is the best. The conversation would never get past Stiga over there. In a way, the standardization would be nice. But at the same time, I’ve always been of two minds about standardization.
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How good were the Americans back in the 1970s? Who were they? Where did they come from in the States? Who did they compete against in Canada? Are any of them still playing?

Let me digress a bit before I present and discuss the guys from America who ventured north of the border to compete. Let me tell you how I found this tournament. Remember, there was no Internet, no websites, no email, and no free long distance calling. It was a different time. I don’t wear my tight butterscotch background with red plaid bell bottom pants anymore. Things change right? Well, some don’t. Here we are thirty plus years later and we’re still playing table hockey. Oh, sure we don’t have to ask our moms if we can play, which we could after our chores were done. No, now we have to ask our wives….after some of the “honey-do / to-do” list has been worked off.

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